black.ink.guilt

this post won't be too long; my message is fairly straight forward and i really don't feel like giving you kids any analytical mysteries today.

i feel like i've been exposed and no,
i wasn't printed without clothes on some tabloid or caught dancing with the near to death mayor of a city too small to remember.
(celebrities, i would just like to add, are complete morons with all that fame ^^)

i've been meddling over with a lot of issues these past couple of weeks, months even and i am completely frustrated that i've come up with absolutely no conclusion of any of them. but as far as i'm concerned, my exposure came a little too dark for my liking and i feel like if you looked again, the photos of this story miiight come out better. writing seems to be my safe outlet to plug my emotions into. that is now shot to hell because i think too much and worry about who i've hurt and who is hurting and who will be hurt.

i don't actually try to start issues believe it or not and i get no pleasure out of being in the midst of them. really, it's not one of those things that i go off skipping into with a handful of daises.

i truly hate drama and though i know it comes with the package of being a girl and also of being in high school, i'd like to have an out of body experience and just observe what i'm doing with anyone in my life. i'm not going to start crying or start slitting my wrists anytime soon but i'm just not that happy with things. simple as that, i'm just not that happy. i find my nose turned up and my lip curled into a scowl more than i intend it to and i need something to escape to.

i'll find it, i know i will.
but i just feel as if i'm starting to lie to my diary and it's just getting good.

ps. major major kudos go out to Jimmy Robbins; Too Sorry For Apologies.

pps. or maybe its pss but which ever way, i may have overstuffed your brains with things to delve into in this post and i guess the intention of making it simple and non-analytical just made it that much more of a goal to confuse you all.