..

just so you know,
this is extremely frustrating to me.
i know it's not your fault.
but it's not mine either -
i'm looking for you to come and help me and pull me out of this mess.
and maybe that's too much to ask for on any given night.
you've got your life to lead and i've got mine.
but i'm so tired of saying that.
i just want to talk to you -
i'm having a rough time
and last time you asked me to talk to you.
so that's what i'm doing.
or trying to do.
i'm going to be cynical just because i really hate this situation.
i'm not angry at you at all
i'm just frustrated that i don't have more control over what's going on.
so just let me hear your voice again, alright?
soon?
it got me through the day today knowing we'd talk.
and it's not too late - it's not.
but it will be soon
and then i'll be sad
and frustrated still.
i just want to know where your head's at
so we're not playing these games anymore.
i feel like i've been writing the same thing for the past few weeks.
but i guess that's because my feelings haven't changed.
what i do know now, more recently developed this is,
is that i want to run away for awhile.
and i want to just be on my own and feel new things, see new things.
get some inspiration and some motivation.
because i'm having a rough time
and i can't talk to you.
and i don't really have anyone here
and i know you think you don't have anyone there.
so come to me then.
let's just run away together and let's follow our dreams together for awhile
without all this stuff that gets in the way every time i try to make this work.
i'm trying to be patient with you, with everyone else, with myself, with my life.
but it's just really frustrating.
and tonight is hard.
and i need you.
because i'm having a rough time.
and i'm frustrated
and lonely
and sad
and cold
..