romance.

three things about romance from these past two days:
1. "Shayna, I'm a sucker for this romance stuff. Even if it's from someone weird" Alyssa
2. "What days are you free? We're having a valentines day dance at temple" Allison
3. " I got your love letters, corrected the grammar and sent them back.
It's true romance is dead, I shot it in the chest then in the head." Giles iPod

my reactions:
1. Yeah. Me too. I'm always going to be willing to tell someone I'll run away with them. I'm always going to want to kiss someone in the rain. I'm always going to think that songs about girls and how much you love them are about me and how much you love me. I'm always going to daydream about huge gigantic gestures in the hallways during school so everyone knows that I have a boyfriend and he loves me enough to do crazy things for me.
2. I'm free all of those days. Know why? I don't make plans. Not this far in advance at least. I don't like Valentine's Day. I want to. I know that I love it. But I don't let myself like it because I'm alone.
3. That's what I'm talking about. Despite this being my head-banger mood at the moment, I think that I will always love the idea of love letters and secretly be writing you them in my head so that when you want to, I'll buy stationary and write them all down, send them to your house, and have you smile. I think letters are so romantic and I don't think people send each other those anymore. Not as much as I think they should at least. But I'll always be ready to write someone a love letter and I think I'm always ready for no one to ask me to.

It's the winter now. It's cold and it's snowing. I've got John Mayer now singing about being together with a girl through all the holidays because no one wants to be alone at Christmas time. And I don't think anyone is either. I'm bitter. True. But I'm also hopelessly romantic. And I still think that if I left my shade up at night, a boy would come and throw rocks at my window. Or if I was walking home from school, he would come and pick me up and take me away. Or if I were sitting by myself somewhere, he'd swing in to sit next to me and hold my hand no matter what we were doing, what was going on, or who was around.

But then again, I keep myself warm at night with a blanket and not by the thoughts of you coming through for me on the whole let's show her how much we love her side.